What Are We Afraid Of?
Our faith in our Father in Heaven and the history of His will and efforts to keep the Principal of Plural Marriage alive in the earth, gives us great comfort and determination. He will fight our battles, wherein we keep his commandments, His yoke is easy and His burden is light. Besides, I still believe that there are many right thinking Americans that love liberty and justice as much as our founding fathers did, maybe they have been silent too long.
Why don’t polygamists shout their blessings and joy from the roof tops? Why don’t we accept the almost daily media requests to come into our homes and film our families? Why wouldn’t a polygamist family reality show finally shine the light on the great misconceptions and slanderous portrayals of our lives and our beliefs? I have pondered this question.
I got the opportunity to listen to Senate Majority Leader, the Honorable Harry Reid’s testimony in front of the U.S. Senate. On the 24th of July, the day we remember our common polygamist pioneer ancestors. The Senator has lived a great life of public service, cleaned up the gaming industry in his state of Nevada, and contributed widely to national affairs in his work as a U.S. Senator. In Senator Reid’s comments he didn’t make a distinction between a perpetrator of crime living within a polygamist community, and polygamists who share the same American struggle to live a clean life and support and build our troubled nation. To the Honorable Senator we are not Mormons. To the Senator, we “cloaked ourselves in the trappings of his religion to obscure our true criminal purposes”. To the Honorable Senator there is no difference between a Polygamist and a criminal. For polygamists there is no presumed innocence.
I woke up this morning and flipped on Bloomberg, I need to check the markets, I already have a text on my phone alerting me that the mortgage backed securities index is up 5 basis points and maybe in positive territory for the day, if only we could sustain a rally for more than one day. My ten month old son is still asleep in my bed, I quietly open my blinds and French door to let the morning air blow though my bed room. I feel a clean breeze of air drift down the hall. My sister wife has her door open too, she was up before me. Her bed is made; she’s in the laundry room starting laundry. Another sister wife has been up since six, she watches the Utah Morning News, Chanel 4, before coming downstairs to make Thursday’s menu, homemade pancakes and hardboiled eggs, I eat the hardboiled egg, if I start eating her pancakes, I’m sure I won’t stop, and my skirt is already tight. Two of our boys are up but not dressed, I have the baby monitor on and hear my son stirring. As I sit by his highchair spoon feeding him one of his other moms’s walks by and gives him a sweet little kiss on the head, “Good Morning Garret”’ he holds up the mooshed pancake to offer her a bite. One by one the sleepy eyed, bed haired kids stagger out to the kitchen bar chairs. Summer vacation makes breakfast go on forever. When school starts we will have some semblance of a schedule, and breakfast might get cleaned up before noon. Our husband has a few of the kids and another sister wife with him on a business trip, we try to be sure the kids have frequent, supervised exposure to the world they live in, we can’t live in a fort like the families that lived in this area 100 years ago did. They have to be able to interact in this world, we hope for them to be contributory in our community and nation.
By 8:30 I am at my desk, the kids aren’t dressed and combed but their other mom will help them, “she doesn’t pull their hair when she is brushing it like, I do”, so I am told by my five year old. The truth… they get a candy when they don’t cry when she brushes their hair. They think I still don’t know about the bribes.
In my inbox is a request sent out to the CPAC Members. A London production crew asking to interview a family with 10 or more kids, I think we are a little over qualified; maybe London TV is not as scary. Why in this great democracy are we so afraid to invite a film crew to breakfast? US Attorney Tolman’s testimony sums it up, “incidents of wiring tapping, investigations of business records, reviewing birth records and baptism records… maybe it’s the public climate, we seem to be the last minority that it’s ok to hate. I think we’re clean?… We don’t believe in underage marriages. I’m not against paying taxes, but I wish they were lower, I think I’m fine that the State’s insisting that my daughter not have sex before she is 18. But, will she get to choose when she is over 18? Do they have a way to offer her a state sanctioned union with the man of her choice? It’s not that we fret about legal marriage certificates; single moms don’t wear a scarlet letter in 2008. However, some immunity from targeted investigations, special task forces, presumption of guilt, and fear of government would be a good legacy to leave our polygamist children.
Merrywives' Blog 
I really appreciate the reminders in your first paragraph of the Lord’s promises. We need that kind of reminder from time to time so that we can keep encouraged in the work we are trying to do.
This is a beautiful post, because of the reminder of our Lord’s promises and the underlining of the fact that those of us who live in polygynous families are just plain, “normal” people, but this is a beautiful post especially because of the portrait of the author’s daily life in which one can plainly see that these people are more than just plain, “normal” people – they are a special people really LIVING our Lord’s new commandment that we love one another as He loved us and gave His life for us … sharing, helping, being there for one another – all without fanfare or tralala – just a plain and normal part of a plain and normal day … which should make it very clear that these people are more than just plain and normal – they are an example of what we all should be, if we are truly commited to following our Lord.
Joyce,
The very household that you described is the simple reason I chose to live this lifestyle today. I commend you and your family for the example that you have given me. We were constantly nagging our parents to take us to see our cousins. We had many slumber parties (all kids sleep in one room), always friends to play with, and one or more moms to always fix your “owies”.
The Lord gives everyone the same opportunity. As I hear negative story after story, I sometimes have to ask myself if these people ever took responsibility for their own welfare and free agency. Isn’t it empowering to stand up for RIGHT? I would rather raise my children to see strong women that stand up for truth than a women that says “she is just being obediant”. I feel its time for Women to take responsibility for the lifestyle they chose.
HI
I was just reading some of your post from a link that was on 4thefamily and thought i would say how much I appreciate a positive view of a polygamous family. I am 57 year old mono married man who has belived plural marriage was not biblicaly wrong since i was 14. My wife would never agree to live that way and looks at all the negative media to support her views. I have even introduced her to a few polygaous families but she always finds the things wrong with them. It would be great if someone was perfect. You are presenting a view that I think is what polygamy should be. About choices and living in love that Jesus has comanded us.Keep up the good work and i hope you have every blessing in life. I am not mormon and do not subscribe to your beliefs as such but do respect your right to choose.